I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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