I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Randomize
