your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
