there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
