Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
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Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
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Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
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