Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
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