The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
