A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
