The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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