So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
you told grandpa to call you daddy
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
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