remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Randomize
