do herpes really smell.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
