This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
