Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
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