I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
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