yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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