So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
Soap is not a condiment
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
