I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
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