she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
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