I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
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