Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
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