so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
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