All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
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