maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
