I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
My liver just had a heart attack.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Randomize
