Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize
