pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Randomize