There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
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I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
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My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
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