Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
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But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
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The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
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