Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
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