**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
17 year olds will be the death of me.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
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