i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
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