Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
I FOUND THE LEGS
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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