IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
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