Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize