I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
You're breaking my sexual little heart
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