I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
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