I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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