im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Randomize
