it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
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