And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
