Who did Billy Mays play for?
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
The air taste purple.
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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