I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
