why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
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