STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Randomize
