garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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