Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
