he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Girls should come with a carfax report
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
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