just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
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