oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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