dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Randomize
